Tuesday, March 4, 2008

overflowing

Each day since the birth of my youngest babe has been pure magic. I am amazed by how grown e seems to me and my strong desire to reel her back into the small pond of my loving arms to hold her as close as possible for as long as possible. There has been much heartache on my part at the loss of my only child family. When i look at our tinier one, i see how different e is from her and yet, how she was just this same babe, what was it yesterday? no, it was almost 2.5 years ago, the quickest time period of my blessed life. i find it hard to describe the depth of my love for e now. when i think about it or stare at her precious porcelain skin, i realize that god has granted me the huge gift of yet another creature to love so strong, like only a mamabear can. this grips my chest tightly with joy at the hope of the future and sorrow at how fleeting each minute with them now seems. i cannot believe that i get to do this thing called love. i get to share life with the man who taught me to love and who still dreams out loud with me after ten years of togetherness. having this newborn lump of goodness in our arms makes everything new, full of hope giving us a grateful longing to be alive.

on my 21st birthday, my dear friend, jessica gave me a poem with a line that describes my current life:

"i am drinking from the saucer because my cup has overflowed"